Hiemal

Remember me?

I don’t xD

More on that later.

Happy New Year! I am only 23 days too early!

The future plans I mentioned here.. well they happened

With it, she brought along massive amounts of change and stress. But that’s to be expected right?

So why am I here, now?

Well it’s my need to post on special days like today, 23.01.23

Sometimes when everything is quiet, like right now, I wonder how is this even real. Sometimes I have to feel the biting cold deep in my bones to realise that this is even real. That I am not in the world of me dreams.

And I have realised that the cold pushes me to feel things in a way I have never felt before. Sometimes it is also comforting to feel what you feel on the inside, on the outside.

There are times where the cold mercilessly sneaks through my layers and cuts off my blood supply to my extremities and then again my outside feels like the inside. It is such a slow definite process. That feeling when you can not put a foot forward cause you feel like you are carrying the weight of the world and everything around you is just going by at speeds you cannot even see.

And in the most unusual way that is when I feel the most alive. So alive that when I get back into the heat all I want to do is remove my bearings to feel that cold again.

I have always been a summer, sun person. But I think I am also a cold person, in private. In the moments that pass by between me, the wind and the snow, I come alive in ways I did not fathom was possible. I feel closer to my source. And I will always, always grab the opportunities to feel close to my source. A letter, an ingredient, cuticles and hair, a smile, a story, a song, a movie, an anecdote, just about anything. Maybe at the end of the day, I am his after all.

So many realisations have been birthed in my mind and it’s a learning process for me. And as I recently heard, “c’est la vie”.

Happy 6 years of writing to me, to my words, and to you- the quiet stranger that voluntarily reads these!

Oh and this playlist is absolutely a VIBE!

See you soon?